Saturday, February 12, 2011

My First Filed Formal Complaint

This week I filed my first ever formal complaint against a company.

I may have felt very...I don't know justified...dignified...indignant...something if not for the fact that by filing the complaint I sealed my fate as a white trash champion forever.

That's right friends I lodged the complaint against the Chevron gas company.

And why you ask?
Don't I love my local gas station with their never ending supply of delicious, thirst quenching soda?

Why yes I do.
Or I should say I did.

But something rather unfortunate happened.

Recently the company came in and fired all the old and middle aged workers (...Crazy Eyes...Chain Smoker...The Guy That Needs a Shower...I'm Too Tired To Get Off My Chair Man...all of them whom I loved and gave Christmas gifts to...all of them that even my kids know on a first name basis) and replaced them with young, sour faced girls and creepy, younger men.

Why?
Who knows.

But I hate it.

And I don't go there anymore.
Seriously.
It makes me that mad.

Will my Dr.Pepper habit survive?
Will I ever love the gas station again?

Only time will tell.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Bix, Vin, and Tam

So Simon is bringing home his take home reading books. We read one incredibly mind numbing book every night and then return it the next day only to have it replaced by something else even more hideous than the first.

Who writes this crap?

Recently the characters in these masterpieces have had names that aren't even words...my personal favorites are Tam, Bix, and Vin. (Apparently the authors of these books haven't visited a suburb here in these United States...if so the characters may have had names like Sam, Tom, Tim, Ben, Jen, Dan, etc...)

Is it too much to ask for my kid to learn to read something where he may actually use the words he's learning to read?

Oh well, I suppose Tam's bird watching adventure was more exciting than tonight's selection where the exact same sentence was repeated on every page. By page 5 Simon lets out a giant sigh and says, "I know, I KNOW!!! How many times do they have to tell me that worker bees help their families?!?"

7 times Simon. 7 times. At least that is how many pages were in your book.