The Price of Using Coupons

Recently I decided to try my hand at using coupons. I clipped and saved. Then I made a list of what items and brands to buy and mapped out my store battle plan. Leaving Jon home with the kids I set out to save some money.

After loading each worthy item in my cart I found it's corresponding coupon, folded it in fourths and deposited it in my pocket. This system worked like a charm and before long I was heading for the check out lines.

Because there is only one grocery store in town it is ALWAYS busy and the lines were at least 4 deep. Then I noticed down on the end a line with only 1 dude in it. I zoomed over and jumped in there. With in seconds I was unloading my heaping cart. I had groceries overflowing and even stacked on the bottom. This was going to take awhile.

A line was quickly forming behind me and everyone was super cranky! The guy behind me (who only had a loaf of bread and some oranges) kept sighing loudly and giving me the stink eye. As I finished unloading the cart and began on the bottom shelf the cashier asked if I was aware that I was in an express 10 items or less lane. Obviously the answer was no.

For the first time in a long time I actually felt my checks start to burn and as I turned to see the 6 or 7 fuming customers behind me I felt like an idiot. I asked the cashier if I should just move all my stuff over to another line. The answer was an annoyed explanation of how it would take her longer to cancel what she had of mine than to just finish my order.

So there I stood humiliated waiting for what seemed like an eternity while she finished ringing me up. Now it was time to pay. Lucky me. I was in a cash only line and I was prepared to pay with a debit card only. More annoyed sighs and a manager was called to unlock the debit card machine with the magic key. Meanwhile, the cashier called for assistance to help bag my load. (Actually she called for all available baggers to assist with a problem at the express lane.)

As the side show grew so did the line behind me. But now my groceries were being sacked and I was able to pay there was just one more issue---the coupons. This was a no coupon checkout line. But I had spent forever coordinating the wretched things. What should I do? There was a brief moment of indecision and then I did it. I started pulling the coupons out of my pocket one at a time and placing them on the counter.

The sighs of disgust were so loud behind me I didn't even look there way. I just started to unfold them and unfold them and unfold them. Feet were shuffling, eyes were rolling, my cheeks were burning and the coupons just kept coming.

When all were accounted for I had saved over $30 in coupons alone. (When you consider the coupons were to save like 25 cents or 10 cents per item that will give you some idea of the amount of coupons scanned.) I used my debit card and a nice young man walked me out of the store. Once we were out of sight of the lynching mob the bagger and I started to laugh and laugh. He told me how mad everyone was (as if I couldn't tell) and then we laughed some more.

After I was done laughing I chucked those groceries in the van bus like some half crazed demon and took off before anyone could ram me with their vehicle. On the way home I wondered if I'm really ready for the extra responsibility of shopping with coupons anyway.